He’s/She's Just Not That Into You
If He’s/She's Having Sex with
Someone Else
There’s Never Going to Be
a Good Excuse for Cheating
If he/she cheats on you, throw the deadbeat out. Just kidding. I know things aren’t that simple. This is a very complicated subject, I’ll admit. Some will argue, “It’s just sex, what does it matter?” Some will argue that you shouldn’t throw away a meaningful relationship just because of one indiscretion. This all may be true. But this is what I know: Whatever problems you may have been having in your relationship, they didn’t merit him/her having sex with someone else. Don’t ask what you did wrong. Don’t share the blame. And in case he/she tells you that it just “happened,” please remember, cheating doesn’t just “happen.” It’s not an accident as in, “Oops, I just slipped and fell into a sexual relationship with someone else.” It was planned and executed with the full knowledge that it could end your relationship.
Know this: If he’s/she's sleeping with someone else without your knowledge or encouragement, he/she is not only behaving like a man/woman who’s just not that into you, he’s/she's behaving like a man/woman who doesn’t even like you all that much. Cheating is bad. Not knowing why you cheated is even worse. If one red flag isn’t enough for you, how about two? Don’t date any man/woman who doesn’t know why he/she does things. You can’t blame a guy/girl for having feelings. You love someone, you break up, you still have feelings. Thank God for that really. But having feelings doesn’t mean you have to have sex. That required him/her to take his feelings and use them to be somewhere alone with his/her beloved, undress, kiss, and do all the other things involved with having sexual intercourse with someone. Hooray for feelings. Just keep them in your pants/skirts.
It’s So Simple
If you are in a mutually established monogamous relationship, then when someone cheats on you, they have decided to blatantly disrespect a very important decision you two made together. They’ve chosen to do this without your knowledge, thereby adding lies and secrecy to your relationship.
Let’s call cheating what it is: a complete betrayal of trust. Cheaters are people who have a lot of stuff to work out and they’re working it out on your time and with your heart. Some cheaters might give you an excuse, some might not have one at all, some might even blame you. No one can tell you exactly what to do when faced with this very complicated and painful situation. But the bottom line is, is this what you had hoped for in a relationship?
Cheating gets easier every time it’s done. It’s only hard the first time, when one feels the sting of morality and the guilt of betraying someone’s trust. Cheating is cheating. It doesn’t matter whom it was with or how many times it happened. A cheater only cheats himself/herself, because he/she doesn’t get to be with you. There is no excuse for cheating. Let me say it again. There is no excuse for cheating. Now you say it. There is no excuse for cheating.
